Friday's Match. What can you say about South Africa...

...to scare them away?
Everything in this World Cup is so tough, so challenging (apart from the two other Southern Hemisphere spoilsports) I ask the question why do we English not have that nasty, bustling firepower that marks out a lot of players from supposedly 'junior' international teams?
No one is going to drown their sorrows in a bottle of aftershave (because; a)too expensive these days and b) hairy is 'in' - apparently). But I digress. England will only win if they blast their way through the midfield of the Boks, keeping their backs in retreat. The back row battle is lost and it is only Wednesday... Robinson will be hurtling back and forth fielding Big Percy's territorial kicks, which squeeze the opposition into a very tight clearance channel. I would hope for an early Josh Lewsey 'hit up' on Habana - a perfectly legitimate disabling movement - and a mass attack of 'prop cramp' in the S.A. front row. For anybody who doesn't know what prop cramp is, it is a condition that causes a prop's brain to ache after it has been active for more than five minutes, leading to stupidity. We can only hope, and I hope I am proven wrong, but, like the German shopkeeper who was attacked with a sausage the other day, I fear the wurst...